A friend forwarded the following advertisement to me, and it gave me an idea. On my next birthday, by way celebration I shall present the first Stroppy Git Award for Meaning­less Twaddle. This is the only nomination so far – a strong contender, I think you’ll agree.

My birthday is 17 January and nominations will close at midnight GMT (or UTC if you prefer) on Friday 13 January 2017. The award will take the form of a blog post dedicated to the perpetrator(s) of the winning entry.