Who is the most reviled man in the world at the moment? There are quite a few candidates, but I think a global vote would put Kim Jong Un at the top of the list: he of the unbecoming and widely derided hairstyle. (No, not that hairstyle, you’re thinking of Donald Trump.)
But what do I see as I walk the streets and the airport transit lounges, when I glance through the windows of barbers’ shops, when I see news clips on TV? Every male human under the age of 30 seems to want to emulate this hated man! Even little boys, for whom the choice of hairstyle is presumably made by their mothers, have shaved sides and bushy tops!
I’m old, I know, and out-of-touch. I’ve given up hoping that I’ll ever really understand the human race. But can anyone explain this bizarre phenomenon to me?
I just read an article about an Iranian model called Elham Arab, who was hauled up before the Revolutionary Court for posting pictures of herself in which her hair was visible – and dyed blonde. This is how she looked in court:
The article included this interesting snippet: “In Islam, hijab can refer both to the headscarf women wear to cover their hair and the principle of modesty that underlies the practice.”
I wondered whether there were parallels in our own culture, and I think I found one: “to be caught with one’s pants down.” In our culture to be without pants is as immodest and shameful as it is for a woman to be without a headscarf in Iran.
Can you think of any more?
I know, I know. Male fashion is an oxymoron. But there are people who are trying to persuade men to jump onto the merry-go-round of waste and vanity that women have been riding for centuries.
Most of the time I can ignore this sad fact, thereby avoiding the onset of stroppiness. But here in Armenia I have cable television and one of my 41 channels is FTV. That stands for Fashion Television and it broadcasts wall-to-wall fashion parades. Worse, some of those parades are for male models wearing… well, I suppose I have to call them clothes but they bear no resemblance to what real men really wear in the real world.
Have you ever seen a male fashion parade? The poor blokes look as if they’re on drugs to dull the emotional pain of being made to look like twerps. Is this a global feminist conspiracy to make men ridiculous? Somebody out there must know something. It’s time to blow the whistle!